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I'm sorry you've gained weight. I'm sorry that after years of baking in the sun your skin is going to look like cracked leather by the time you're thirty," I said advancing a step. "I'm sorry you feel it's appropriate to show up in a padded bra and spandex looking like a tramp at the bride's house on the weekend of her wedding. I'm even sorry you wore stiletto heels in soft dirt. Honey, don't you know that's a sure-fire way to break off a heel on those cheap knock-offs?"I took another step towards The Bug. "I'm sorry that only now do you realize that Danny is going to earn fifty times what anyone you're currently screwing is gonna make and you won't be there to spend it. But, most of all, I'm sorry that after years of being used like a cheap sex toy, your high school sweetheart still hasn't put a ring on your finger. What's the matter? Is he starting to get tired of the same-old, same-old with you?" I don't see any bling on your finger," The Bug tried to mount a small attack."Danny. "She's here. I'm putting you on speakerphone." Hi, Ms. Allard," Warren said. "Mr. Golick tells me you're a figure skating fan. Do you know who Warren Kelleher is?" Sure!" Linda said. "He's an ice dancer. Won the silver medal at nationals, and just won junior worlds." That's me." Really?" Linda said. "Wow! I'm a big fan!" Thank you," Warren said."OK, there's a point here, but I'm missing it," Mr. Golick said, bemused."Ice dancers have partners," Warren said. "Mine's name is Sophia Daniels. As an added bonus, she's also my girlfriend. You'll find her application on your desk, somewhere. We know she got in to Wisconsin, but we haven't heard about her financial aid deal yet. Wherever we go, we go together." Got it. Let me find Miss Daniels' file and see where we're at." Great!"Warren called Sophia and told her about the phone call. Thirty minutes later, Warren got called back."Full scholarship!" Sophia crowed into the phone. "And, it had nothing to do with you, I was getting it anyway, I.
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